today was rough, I think I will be recovering from it for a while. reminders of the past were all too real again. nothing has been easy today. i haven't slept in over 30 hours... and it got fucking cold.

how long, oh lord?
how long will you forget me?
how long will you hid your face from me?
how long must i wrestle with my thoughts,
and every day have sorrow in my heart?