Monday, January 10, 2005

I think I am starting to figure out my problem with YOU

Clearification.... for the purpose of this post you refers to the institutionalized church... it is based on my experience with my curent institutionalized church... if this post comes across as general and is not true about your church I am sorry... also you may refer to my current church but it in no way refers to any specific person... I have been told that the things I am going to say are just further proof that I truely belong in the postmodern church....


so you say that you want us to be involved, but you know that isn't true... you only want us to be involved to the extent that you decided... you don't care about what gifts God has given us or what He has called us to do... No it is about what you want... it is about what suits your needs...there is so much you are missing out on because you are too caught up in looking good to the world... if you would just take a second and look at what is going on in the middle of you it would be obvious that there are ppl that can help, but you would have to let them be all that God ment for them to be... you wouldn't be able to hinder them from doing what God has called them to do... instead you tell ppl that you want them to find their purpose and do God's will, but the second they try to do that you start spouting off all the reasons that they can't do it... One day this will be your downfall... one day it will be evident that it isn't just the perfect and "holy" that lead you, but also the messy... hope I am still around to see that day... but I doubt I will be here...



okay so what does all this mean for my life... what application do my thoughts have on what I am going to do... well, thankfully I am in a wonderful online community, so I won't suffer in that aspect... I am going to do just what you want me to so though... I am going to stop.... I will be at service on Sunday, and I will still go to a small group whenever I can, but that will be the extent of my involvment in with you... no more bending over backwards just to prove to you that God can use me too... it is obvious that you don't care... it is more than obvious that you think that I am not good enough to be used by God.... so I will just continue to search until I find a physical community that believes me, and believes that God can use ppl no matter how messy the person....



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